Beautiful Death

Okay, so I'm going along merrily in Kleopatra's POV, adding all sorts of new layers and ideas and such. I'm just about finished with her sections, but I've still got a lot of play in word count yet. Plenty of room to expand the worldbuilding of New Olympia.

In particular, Wanda asked "Why don't they drive cars?"

Now Hades did mention in a discussion to Isabella on the road to Delphi that he's working with inventors to convert our cars into something that runs on his power like Erebus. I thought I'd expand that idea, especially since I've been thinking more like a Macedonian lately (as Kleopatra). Why not go ahead and have a tweaked car? Why not let them drive to Delphi instead of walk?

I don't lose any action scene there. It's all conversation. Oh, there is an emotional power play between Hades and Isabella, so maybe he shouldn't be driving this super car himself. He's Lord of the Underworld anyway, so someone should drive him.

Hmmmm. Who could drive him? It can't be Charon -- he's busy betraying. How about Cerberus? He was in the original draft as a triwolf but I lost him in the major rewrite. That would be cool. Not a normal everyday werewolf, but one with three heads. *g* So who should I base him on? What's his story? Even though he only plays a minor part right now, who knows what the future holds?

So I thought some more. I had a feeling, suddenly, that Cerberus was *big.* He's a main player, hiding out, biding his time. Why? How did he come to House Aegae on Macedon? Why would he follow Philip to Earth? He's not exactly a betrayer, at least I don't think so. Not like Charon. But he needed to be something big, special, unique to justify just "throwing" him in.

I also realized that the ending of BD eliminates my main antagonist. Actually, both of them. Xerxes is still going to be a threat, but historically, Alexander conquered Persia, so who cares. Expanding Cerberus could give me the big piece I needed to suddenly have a very major player, a major antagonist who could drive the following books in the series (assuming I have reason to write them).

So take all this together. Big bad enemy. Someone who has a reason to hide out, loosely based on mythology/history/legend. Wolves. Contemporary or at least close to Philip II of Macedonia and Alexander the Great.

The name Cerberus was known as before he ever came to Earth? REMUS.

As I indicated the other day, the Vergina Sun gave me the idea to define 16 Houses to play out the political war on Macedon. Note--many of these names won't be used at all, if ever. Some of the names are odd, hard to pronounce, etc. It would get horribly confusing to infodump all this garbage in the story, but in my geekdom, I felt I needed to know everything, and it never ceases to amaze me how certain little things can dictate remarkably wonderful worldbuilding. IMO.

The capital of Macedon is obviously Vergina, then, the center of the sun, ruled by the Megaskyr. The Megaskyr sits on the Sun Throne, and a 16-point star is embossed on the throne, as well as inlaid in the marble floors. Oh, did I mention that although there are certain elements of a "normal" palace, Vergina is actually built inside a massive choka tree and maintained with the current Megaskyr's power? Sometimes the walls are stone, sometimes they're the living, breathing walls of the choka, which must be coaxed into supporting the palace. If the Megaskyr's power were to fail..... Hmmm. *g*

Now the historical Kleopatra was from Macedonia, but she had a brother named Attalus who mouthed off in front of Prince Alexander (insulting him and his mother, the Queen) and almost caused a war. So appropriately, Kleopatra's original House is Attalus.

The more ancient name for the capital of Macedonia was Aegae. That's the name of Philip's House, ruled by his father, Amyntas.

Xerxes, historically, was a king of Persia, also called the Achaemenid Empire. Hence, his House's name is Achaemenid, ruled by his father, Mnemom. Why be difficult and stupid? While I like the name, I can't pronounce it. So Persia is Xerxes's house.

The other minor Houses:

• Rhodes
• Pydna
• Caria
• Molossis
• Illyria
• Larissa
• Chios
• Phocis
• Strymon (actually a river, but I really liked the name)
• Thessaly
• Olynthus
• Methone
• Pherae

The Butterfly is still soaring. It's weird, this certainty I had about BD and this contest. I told Sis that it was like taking a college exam and having people ask me later how I thought I did. I either ACED it or FAILED it utterly. Either I absolutely nailed BD or I have no stinking clue about anything. Which is absolutely possible. I once took an exam on Algebraic Theory and thought I did okay. I got a 26/100. I was dumbfounded.

So I was afraid when it looked like BD didn't final. I was afraid it was like Alegbra all over again. What a relief and great joy to find that BD did final as I hoped. As I dreamed.

I swear, before I heard the news, I'd already committed to a new butt crack of dawn schedule to get the second draft finished as quickly as possible. Watch the Dreaming in Rhyme blog for the nitty gritty details if you're interested. The biggest developments are as follows:

1). I think I'm going to change Cleopatra's name to Kleopatra. I saw it spelled this way while researching the ancient capital of Macedonia, and I like it. I also think it might help with the Egyptian Cleopatra confusion. Philip II of Macedonia DID marry a Cleopatra (not Alexander's mother though) and she was assassinated shortly after him.

2). Writing in Kleopatra's POV means I need more worldbuilding on Macedon. I never needed much beyond snippets in Hades' POV. Placing scenes IN Macedon requires a whole nother level of detail, though. While looking for the historical capitals and cities of Macedonia, I found an interesting tidbit about the Vergina Sun. What a cool coincidence. That gave me so much it's not even funny. Now I have 16 Houses on Macedon, all in constant conflict to vie for the throne.

3). Xerxes is coming to life too, a necessity as he is the primary conflict that Kleopatra is facing. I need urgency on her part. After 5 years, why would she dare try to take Philip again? Ah. I know now.

I'm hoping to add about 10K words in this draft. I don't know that this is even possible by the end of the month, or with my list of revision ideas. Adding Kleopatra's POV will help, obviously, as well as enrich the story with new worldbuilding details. Cool stuff.

Rip off the wings of the Butterfly.

There's only one thing I want, one thing I need. It's something I can't find here on this damned hunk of rock. I can only find it at home on Thrace.

What I need is a mate. A woman. Someone who can be my anchor.

Why would a powerful drakon like me need some delicate little female? It's very, very simple. When a Thracian reaches full maturity, the clock starts ticking. Each time I transform to my beast, there's a risk I won't be able to come back.

Don't get me wrong. I love being a drakon. I love flying, fighting, tearing shit up. I love keeping Hades' peace. I could even love this planet. All I need is her. The one who can bring me back. Who can tame my drakon. Who can fly with me. Who can love me despite the blood on my hands.

Hades doesn't know the risk. I owe him, you see. He saved my life while my father held him as hostage on Thrace. Back to back, surrounded by enemies, we learned by accident what we could do together. It required just one little thing. Blood. My blood, to be precise.

Now Hades has a bond with me. He hears my thoughts, uses me, even feeds on me. And for the most part, I never really minded. He's a decent enough skyr. Together, we ended the endless war between Thrace and Macedon. He's arrogant, but they all are. Besides, younger sons don't get much real duty and honor on Thrace. Hades is damned powerful with his own Megaskyr pissed at him. He needed me, and I liked feeling useful.

Until we came here to Earth. I lost my middle brother and his mate here. It's my fault they were assigned to Erebus, so I claim full responsibility for their deaths. Now we're exiled here with these pitiful humans. Weak, spineless, sniveling little creatures with no understanding of real power.

Worse, the virus wrecked my control. Each time I transform, it's a gamble. Will I come back, or will I fly the night skys forever? Not to mention the hunger inside me. Hades bitches about his dependency on blood, but he has no idea what it's like to crave bleeding, kicking, screaming meat. He takes a little nibble and goes on his way. Me, I tear the fucker apart.

I guess that's still not enough to excuse my betrayal. He'll never understand why I took the Megaskyr up on her offer. When my brother died, when our hungers changed, and we were chained to this planet with no hope of ever going home, I accepted Cleopatra's power. She has a trapdoor inside my head, and she knows everything I know. Everything Hades tells me. Everything I see and think and know, she possesses.

My price? A mate. Cleopatra promised me a Gate home so I could find my woman, my anchor. Someone who can embrace my drakon, tolerate my need for flesh, and pull me back from the madness and murder the virus condemns me to. I tell myself every night when I open my eyes, and every day when I lay down alone that she's out there. Waiting for me. A mate for my beast.

Deep down, though, I know the truth.

Ain't no way anybody's gonna save me. I'm never leaving this planet. It's too late for me. I'm too corrupted by the virus. My own father would shoot me down like a rabid beast, and he'd be perfectly within his right to do so.

Madness crawls inside my head, fed by desperation and all the blood on my hands. It's a monster gnawing at me day after day after day. Trapped. I'm trapped, and I'm losing my mind, and I'm running out of time.

And despite all his power, all his knowledge, the only thing Hades senses is a big black hole in his bond. He has no idea what price I'm willing to pay for even a glimmer of hope.

This song by H.I.M. has proven to be a powerful theme song for the final quarter of the story. I loved it even before I knew the background about the lyrics. First, the lyrics themselves:

Heaven ablaze in our eyes
We're standing still in time
The blood on our hands is the wine
We offer as sacrifice

[Chorus]
Come on, and show them your love
Rip out the wings of a butterfly
For your soul, my love
Rip out the wings of a butterfly
For your soul

This endless mercy mile
We're crawling side by side
With hell freezing over in our eyes
Gods kneel before our crime

In mythology, butterflies can often be symbols of immortality and/or innocence because of their beauty. Sometimes, ripping out the wings of a butterfly gives eternal life. Some believe that immortal souls have the wings of a butterfly. According to Ville in an interview, he says:

So I was thinking, for me, it was more about "rip out the wings of a butterfly for your soul". I was thinking: 'Are you willing to destroy your past and burn some bridges down to be able to step up to the next level, in a relationship or even spiritually?'

Wow. I love this song. I love how this story is coming together.

I had to stop and look to see when I started this blog and this project. July 2005. A whole year. Without a single draft finished.

I wasted too much time and energy on doubts. On other people's opinions. What I should or should not be writing. How many flaws my characters have; my story; my premise; my writing in general.

I'm sick of it. It's MY damned dream! If I don't fight for it, who will?

I meekly stood passive and silent, letting people rip out the butterfly's wings. I believed it necessary and good so I could grow as a writer, while in reality it crippled me. I crammed my wide, flat, size 9 feet into dainty glass slippers so I could go to the ball. They laughed at me anyway and tore off my fake wings, just as the stepmother did in Ever After.

And the saddest part? I truly believed the butterfly was a fat ugly slug, and the dream was just a costume anyway.

No more. I borrowed Sis's kick-ass boots and I'm marching toward the finish line. Leading the way, the butterfly soars ahead of me on stained-glass wings that no one will ever shred again.

Isabella has taught me that some things are worth killing for. I will kill to keep the butterfly's wings safe this time. The silver sword is in my hand and I won't hesitate to use it.

Nothing's going to stop me now.

[Brainstorming notes to consider while making revisions in the next draft. Some themes and elements need more work to cement them into story.]

Why a butterfly? From the beginning, the blue-black butterflies have been powerful images for this story. I knew butterflies from the very beginning. Why, though?

It goes back to her father. The years in his research lab, when she was his princess and he was the brilliant genius who could save anybody. Save the world. Did he collect them? Did he tell her a story about them? Something. It became HERS though, over time. Her signature. Perhaps something tied to her mother's death. I've often seen butterflies about dead animals, a beautiful yet gruesome picture. She could consider it some kind of sign, though. She feels guilty about her mother's death, but her strength at that time defined her. She became BEAUTIFUL DEATH because of that first mercy killing.

So I think the butterfly is tied to her mother, not her father. I think that makes it more powerful. The royal-blue color was from her father -- it matches their eyes. But the symbol itself is tied to her mother's death.

It needs to carry through the story, though. At another dark moment or moment of death, she needs to see the butterfly, or recognize it in some way.

Also, there's something about Icarus. How did he know about the butterfly? It's likely something she told him, and he latched onto it as a trademark for her personality in the Cities. I've long been playing with the idea that he's betraying her somehow. That he gave or continues to give Zeus information about her. Then when Zeus began his manipulation via the virus, he created her trademark wings in her power. But why would he do this if the butterfly sign came from her mother? Not really sure yet. Keep thinking. The pieces will fall into place eventually.

From dream interpretation:

A dream of a butterfly could be telling you to settle down and not to flit from person to person or it could have to do with social situations.. The bigger and more beautiful the butterfly, the more of an impression you will make on society, or at a special function that you must attend. Use the other symbols in your dream to get you on the right track. Link

More: (emphasis mine)
A butterfly within a dream often symbolizes the onset of a period of transformation
Symbolic of a life cycle
Learning to release the past and embrace the new
Living in the present
A need to slow down and reflect on your growth thus far
Beauty, lightness, freedom, sensitivity
A disfigured butterfly may symbolize having outgrown your present situation or cycle
Failure to commit or invest time in something, flitting around
Someone who is unable to stick to one interest, place or occupation for a reasonable period of time
Butterflies in the tummy are indicative of nervousness, anxiety, worry or stress
A person who never settles with one interest or in one place for long
The colour of the butterfly may provide further interpretational clues.
Link

More (ignoring the stuff on infidelity)
butterfly is a symbol of changeability. It may imply that you are going through an inner change like caterpillar transforms into a butterfly! And this change is going to be positive. Link

I don't even remember where I got the Archetypes Storytelling Cards link. Perhaps from Paperback Writer's Monday ten? Anyway, I updated my site today and added a few new links. I decided to check this one out. Something had snagged my attention about it, but I'd never spent time going over it.

Now I love web tarot. Some funky things have happened the few times I've played with it. The Archetypes site is sort of like standard tarot, but it's specific to character. Since I've been in a bit of a funk with Isabella and BD in general, I thought about her. Where is the story going? What do I need to accomplish? Am I on the right track?

Here's what I got from the 3-character spread.

The Past: The Noble.

Injustice, reward without merit, nepotism

Basic Interpretation:The Noble sits upon a throne, basking in his riches and blind to the suffering of those who hold him where he is. He is unaware (or possibly unconcerned) with the price paid by others to maintain his unearned position and wealth. He simply feels entitled to his lofty lifestyle.

This is totally Isabella at the beginning of the story. She's living in Athens, which she believes to be a paradise, while people die outside. Locked outside for many reasons, not just the virus, all for Zeus's grand scheme of the perfect human race. By her blood tests alone, she would have been excluded from Athens in the first place. But because she's Zeus's daughter, she was accepted without question.


The Present: The Judge

Justice, consequence, judgment, seriousness, lack of humor, absolute definitions of Right and Wrong, dogma

Basic Interpretation:Seated between icons of life and death, the Judge peers sternly and disapprovingly upon the convicted. He is the protector of the status quo and uninterested in new ideas. He passes judgment conservatively and dispassionately; no humor is allowed in his court.

Again, this is spot on. When the story opens, Isabella is First Marshal, executioner for the Pantheon. She believes she's executing justice. She hates the monsters without question. There is no room for middle ground -- anyone who's contaminated should be exterminated. Then, of course, her own contamination drives her out of her paradise, out of her comfort zone into the real world, where she begins to see the dark, ugly truth. She begins to see the monster she was all along.


The Future: The Knight

Structure, service, loyalty, fidelity, follows rules, responsibility

Basic Interpretation:Dedicated to his superiors and the oaths he has taken, the Knight stands ready to joyously serve. The Knight's loyalty and fidelity are beyond question. He has earned the honor other bestow on him by his skill and loyal service.

So this one I need to think about and work on some more. She's to the dark moment, the realization that she has killed many innocent people. That many innocent people suffered and died because of her grand Cities' exclusion policy. She starts to believe she's no better than Hera's Keres. Her loyalty to Athens is broken, but she hasn't established loyalty to anyone else yet. She still doesn't believe in Hades. But loyalty and trust in him is what will pull her through, help her defeat Zeus in the end. I need to make her worthy through loyalty and fidelity.

Someday I need to buy me a set of these cards.....

Toward the end of March and throughout April, I wrote on this project like gangbusters. May has been dismail. I'm stuck. Why? I'm in another sex scene!

That's a serious problem with me, perhaps a flaw. Once I get the characters in bed, I always seem to have a hard time moving on with the story. All they want to do is stay in bed.

This is it, Isabella. Finish this already and start the trip to Delphi. Apollo has something very important to tell you.

As the Megaskyr of Macedon, she has reason to fear Hades. Wild beasts turn on their handlers the moment they're freed from their cages, and Hades was certainly hers to control many years ago. Exiled on the distant planet of Earth, he is caged if not exactly leashed for her power. He must not be allowed to return. Ever.

She is the supreme weakness.